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Art by Trent Lovett

I Crave It

Poem by BellA AppleTon

I crave it

But I know I’m better without

it helps me take away the ease

And yet the world still tears apart

I guess nobody seems to understand

What has been done can never change

The actions in past

The scar still in our future

Reminding us it’ll never go away

But we can move on

Leave the mistakes behind and hope it’ll only get better

But most of us know it’ll only seem to get worse

We tell them everything is fine

And they seem to believe the lies

When I get home it never gets better

I fell in love with someone I thought loved me and understood,

Yet just like the others leaving me for someone they thought was good

Now I keep my feelings bundled inside

Not giving away the key,

Afraid to let anybody in

it’ll be to late give them the key

They have already moved one…not worthy of my love

My insides are fragile and seem to be caving in

All the damage only made it thinner and thinner

I began to skip meals and lost track of what I ate

Going days being hungry and backing out cause I was sick

When I tried to eat it would always leave, causing me to get pushed by the breeze

Lighter and lighter as the days went on,

My bones were now clearer and my skin with no pigment

My eyes so dull and legs to weak to go on

But yet I seem to get a boost from nothing telling to continue on

Pushing harder and my life began to rise

My body much stronger and I began to eat

Not causing the pain against my skin and making a difference from where I began

I still feel worthless…

At least I tried to show them I was living and giving it a try

Still forgotten and left behind

The girl cries in the rain so the tear just blend in

The girl who tried so hard but always got pushed

The girl who died trying to live